|Come in and||cozy up!|
|Here are some encouragements of joy, hope, streams in the desert places, and promises fulfilled!||Click a book to read...|
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Life forever giving glory to You. . . .
For about ten years, I had been receiving words that I need to write down the tid-bits that Daddy-God has shown me, so I started in 2011 even tho I was hesitant bc I didn't want my God-stories to come across as me-stories. I don't share my stories bc I need to talk, I share my stories bc I'm bursting w/ an awe and wonder of Him! While I have never wanted others to groan thru the details, I so want them to know that if it matters to us, it matters to Him, every little part... and! the details are usually where Daddy-God's Glory shines the brightest bc He is Lord of the details!! - After Heidi Baker told her story of how the Lord clarified to her that He wanted her to tell her Jesus-stories, He said to me, So, are you going to learn the easy way or the hard way? So, here it goes -
One of my greatest desires is to see what Daddy-God can do when He is not hindered, not held back because of sin, unbelief/doubt, fear, and any other generational patterns that are not Kingdom. . . I am desperate to live out the greatest extent of the fullness of what He can accomplish in, thru, and with a completely yielded human being. There is so much of His Kingdom out there, all around us, and we've only begun to tap into it to make it apart of our daily reality. Not everything that happens is Daddy-God's Will or Plan, so I want more, all of Him and His Kingdom Reality that this human frame can handle, everything I need to be able to partner w/ Him to bring His Kingdom of freedom, wholeness, healing, miracles, peace, overflowing joy, ... to earth!Renewed awareness in memory of a treasured one, July of 2013. How he loved and honored others well..
Even tho a completely yielded heart that goes after Him and bringing His Kingdom here may be a great thing, am I going to be able to answer that final question: did I actually learn to Love? Since this ultimately is why we are on this planet, is my life all about learning how to truly Love and pour myself out for others as Daddy-God, Jesus and Holy Spirit relentlessly pour Themselves and all Their Love into me?
Since God is Love, what does that look like?
Nov. 10, ... end of Nov., 19
God anointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Spirit and with power. He went about doing good and healing all who were oppressed by the devil, for God was with Him. Acts 10:38
The pin in my ankle had been hurting more, and I was wondering if I needed surgery. So tonight when Pastor Bill had a word for metal in the right ankle, I stood and a few people prayed for my ankle.
If You're going to remove the pin, You have to heal my brain so I can walk right without the pin.
Nov. 18 - no pain from the pin - only a strange bone pain if I walk wrong..walking carefully, learning how to walk right. Hmmmmmm, walking out my healing? Thank You Jesus.. even tho I'm not sure what this is, I thank You for healing my ankle!
Nov. 25 - brain caught the pattern on walking heel in and toe out, so I can feel how to tell my muscles how to keep my heel in and toes out. Walking straighter with less conscious thot and no pain! Wow!! Thank You Jesus!!!
Nov. 3, 19
Daddy-God is Love, so Loving on the one in front of us is a Love offering to Him, an act of pure worship.Posted by Jessica at 8:15 PM. Post a comment.
Oct. 27, 19
The Vicar of Bagdad, Andrew White, spoke on radical divine reversals tonight. So many stories, like how he was given Saddam Hussein's palace, Saddam's throne is now Andrew's pulpit and the pool is their baptismal tank! ...Posted by Jessica at 1:16 PM. Post a comment.
Oct. 17, 19
Love is the commitment to care for and honor the loved and their best interests.Posted by Jessica at 3:57 PM. Post a comment.
End of Sept... Oct. 9, 19
Circumstances shouldn't be the determining factor in our decision-making process. Watching what Daddy-God does reveals His Will, Desires and Purposes, "His bigger picture"... what we need to value and pursue.2000/2001 - Dream: being in leadership/administration like I was at the college, only in a company that was all about giving people with disabilities a fulfilling life and the support they need to fulfill their dreams.
Oct. 5, 12 - interview with Compass, met 2 - Happy Birthday to me!
Oct. 6-8, 12 - Compass Retreat, met 5 - saw how Compass was the company I had seen in my dream 11/12 years earlier.
Asked Daddy-God to give me people to have history with bc life/the enemy? has disconnected me from every single person Daddy-God has connected me with - therefore, no one outside of relatives has history with me.Mayish, 19 - one is my mentor for the Compass E-Core group
Aug. 6, 19 - met with 2
Aug. 11, 19 - ran into E-Core mentor at second service (God-Timing follow-up meeting!)
Oct. 3, 19 - first year I wouldn't get to see any of them for my birthday, then E-Core mentor called needing a signature, so he picked me up from Shasta College ;)
Oct. 5, 19 - treasured friend said "Happy Anniversary to us!" (and Happy Birthday to me!)
Posted by Jessica at 1:57 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 11, .. 16, 19
Walking in the Truth has always been a huge deal to me bc I grew up under so many partial/slivers of truth, wrong interpretations of Truth and horrible lies of the enemy. So the fact that the Truth can set us free is extremely real to me. Earlier today, I heard someone talking about believing that the earth being flat, which has been scientifically proven to not be true; the earth is round, so it was very disturbing that such an obvious and proven truth would be denied. It made me wonder..
How could such an obvious fact not be believed? What Truths am I not believing??
Then I saw some small things that had been excused, and I felt like Daddy-God was showing me that when small things aren't seen and dealt with correctly, one's perspective/awareness of Truth is even further off with bigger issues. Avoiding Truths bc of pain or for any other reason in one area will distort our perspectives on Truths in other areas. - Soooo.. it made me realize that the more yeilded we are in every area to Holy Spirit, the closer we'll stay in line with His Truths across the board. It intrigues me that walking/living in Truth as with everything else that's Kingdom requires us to use/partner our whole being with Him:
our minds with our spirit/discernment (test the spirits, 1 John 4:1-3),Posted by Jessica at 10:00 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 6, 19
"walk in the way of insight - of apprehending the true nature of a thing, especially through intuitive understanding
Here's a story of how someone's insight forever changed my perspective on the importance of how we respond to people and their behavior's. Early in my journey of healing, part of the healing process was learning to trust my treasure's dad. One afternoon, I had gone up to see him, but when I saw he wasn't there, the fear of having messed up and being so weird that he wished he'd never met me overwhelmed me as I went back home. I knew that I had to go to choir that night bc I was meeting friends there, so I hardened my heart bc I knew the sweet safe relationship was done. We walked into the small amphitheater and sat down, and I mustered all the strength and hardness I had to look up and glare at him. I glared at him long and hard bc it would hurt less if he gave up on me bc I was nasty to him. W/out missing a beat, he smiled back at me and said w/ a wink, "It's good to see you, Jessica." Immediately, I felt the hardness melt away and I felt stronger too, Maybe he didn't regret knowing me. He seemed to smile extra encouragingly during practice, then after practice he came over to me, "I wasn't in my office all day today, was I?"
I shook my head, wondering how he knew I'd come by.
He didn't apologize bc he had done nothing wrong; instead, he let me know why he wasn't there, hinting that it wasn't all that fun, as if to say that he wasn't avoiding me. Then he left the conversation w/ an invitation to come back, try him again when he could be there. ~ That has shown me how to set healthy boundaries w/ people while letting them know that I still like them and am not rejecting them. Then... if I know that I have set healthy boundaries w/ honor, pure love and encouragement, I must realize that I've done my part and their response is their responsibility, not mine.Posted by Jessica at 2:25 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 3, 19
As August came to a close and September began, I felt Daddy-God wanting me to write down what had happened over the summer along with their dates bc the Timing was meant to confirm my walk, my roles, places of authority and responsibilities. Acknowledging and giving thanks for the small things often reveals a bigger picture...
End of July ... Aug. 5, 19
The purpose for everything in the Kingdom is to bring our attention to the King and to glorify Him. We can bring Him glory and honor by honoring and loving the treasures of His heart in wholeness and freeedom.. every single person around us is a treasure of His heart! We can only love and honor others as freely as we are healed and whole. As long as I am uncomfortable with how my CP shows itself on me, I won't have the ease or confidence to embrace and honor those who have noticeable imperfections. I've had to replace "I can'ts..." with "Help me to..." and even "Help me to want to care and want to work on..." In order to fully, deeply and completely and freely love and and honor others we must be completely open and working with His on-going work of healing and restoration in own hearts. Our call to be free isn't just for our benefit.. our inner freedom is the key to being able to fully love and honor those around us.Posted by Jessica at 1:52 PM. Post a comment.
July 14 ... 21, 19
Pastor Bill spoke on these verses the morning I lost my treasure.. Lifting others' hands and strengthening them thru prayer/worship while coming alongside them won't make their decisions for them, but it will change their options as our prayer/worship brings the Kingdom into their atmosphere. Forgiveness works much the same way - when we forgive others, Daddy-God forgives them and us.. and it can start them off onto a road of freedom with greater Kingdom options if they so choose! :')Posted by Jessica at 11:55 PM. Post a comment.
July 11, 19
Sometimes others can't move into the places they're suppose to be without our support - community :')Posted by Jessica at 11:44 AM. Post a comment.
June 6, ...12, 19
Daddy-God is so amazing, and His ways astound me! This is from an old post that's been esp. real lately. - Dreaming when we're lost in worship is a good check to see if our "day dreams" are truly from Him or not, it also softens and changes us at the heart level so that our pain doesn't cause hardness to set in, and! dreaming w/ Him is another form of worship!! Praising Him also does amazing things, like keeping us on an even keel, mentally healthy, and unscarred - And! the only time in all eternity that we'll be able to give Him a sacrifice of praise is now :')Posted by Jessica. Post a comment.
End of May, 19
Empathy fascinates me bc understanding and sharing the feelings of another is such a big part of loving and honoring them. So how can I empathize with someone who is very unlike me?Posted by Jessica. Post a comment.
May 21, 19
Posted by Jessica at 12:24 AM. Post a comment.
Early May, 19
Owning/walking in the truth of who we are is so freeing! Daddy-God has been honing in on my taking ownership of roles He placed me in/created me for, specifically in leadership, as the wife of a worship leader and as a mom.. bc each role carries authority to release things specific for each role. As my strength grows in owning, feeling and walking in each role, the freedom is exhilerating! but it definately hasn't come w/out hits, which in turn only make us stronger!Posted by Jessica at 4:40 PM. Post a comment.
April 25 ... 30, 19
I've known that in order to be around healthy people, I'd have to learn healthy patterns, so when I left for college, I set to it. I also learned a lesson in being obedient and trusting God the semester I had no place to live and was going here and there.. part of the way through that semester a supposedly perfect place opened up everyone encouraged me to go bc it was logical, but God said no. I went anyway and it was horrible..never doing that again. That experience taught me in black and white to only go where His peace is. Very necessary to learn that then..needed that for staying with my dearest boy. God is so good!
Thursday I found out that my boss is hoping I will apply for a better-paying job that's opening up, but I so don't feel good about it. The environment is very similar to things from when I grew up, and I've been actually hoping to be able to somehow cut back to one or two days a week when this semester is over. Friday morning I had a dream that I was on a dock looking to see how to get on a boat that I was suppose to be on when a group of Compass people flooded on, then it left the dock before I could reach it. So I ran to the end of the dock just as someone from the group realized I had missed the boat, and they turned around and came back to pick me up! Confirmation on pursing the things of Daddy-God's Heart and His peace along with healthy people who are genuinely seeking Him.Posted by Jessica at 11:33 PM. Post a comment.
April 19 - 21, 19 ~ Easter weekend
When we forgive others, Daddy-God forgives them and us. Do unto others as we want Daddy-God to do for us .. and it can also send them off onto a road of freedom! :')Posted by Jessica at 10:04 PM. Post a comment.
April 15, 19
Before worship started lasted night, I was talking with the dad of a family I sit near, and we were sharing fun God-stories. This one makes me laugh, so I thot I'd share.. My family moved to So. Cal. from Arizona the summer before my frosh year of high school, which meant a lot of firsts and new things - a new school, first time in a public school, first time going from class to class with 6 different teachers, and a first at having to prove myself to my teachers since no one knew me. I didn't know how easily I could be pulled out and sent to a Special Ed. class, so I worked hard and kept quiet bc I loved my classes, esp. my biology class.. Mr. Walker was so much fun. Since I couldn't do the disections, I made sure I carried my weight in other ways when we had lab. On one of our first labs, he called us over to the lab area, so I scrambled to grab my lab book only to realize once I was over there that I had forgotten my pencil! It would take too long to run over to my desk, How do I do this?! Help Lord!
Just then, my right hip bumped against a table, and I felt something hard in my right pants pocket.. it was my pencil! Since I have almost no control of my right arm and it mostly only responds in reflexive ways (if someone comes near my right side my right arm willl swing out), I knew that only Daddy-God could have slipped it in there.. to make a point. He sees, He knows, and He cares to make us laugh! :')Posted by Jessica at 11:22 PM. Post a comment.
April 5, 7, ... 12, 19
It's challenge to be somewhere where freedom is thot of differently, and you know you're there to bring Kingdom. I found myself remembering something Daddy-God had taught me years ago.. Instead of thinking it's hard, so this must not be God's Will - realize that it's where He's called us to be and figure out what we need to be successful so we can ask Him for those provisions. It's made me laugh to see how empowering that's been for me as He's used this to increase my boldness with Him. Being encouraged to approach God with freedom and confidence (Eph. 3:12) is empowering and leads to a confident You're wanting me here, so I need..Posted by Jessica. Post a comment.
March 31, 19
I read this chapter last night, then Eric talked about it this morning! Joseph was sold into slavery but gained favor with Potiphar, then he was wrongly accused and put in prison but gained favor with the prison warden before finally being raised up to second in command to Pharaoh. If it's not good, it's not over!Posted by Jessica at 9:45 AM. Post a comment.
March 12, ..24, 19
As I was cleaning up the html code for this blog, I found an entry on why I want to work at Comppass and how my experiences with my dearest boy and his dad had ignited a passion in me to grow my EQ/ability to see/read and respond to people accurately so they can heal as I had begun to. I also want to interact with people, esp. clients at Compass, in a way that brings them out like my dearest boy and his dad did with me. The freedom they brought me into made me come alive and drives me want to do the same for our clients through finding insights, supports and routines that could help them feel more alive, connected and able to engage more with the world/people around them.Posted by Jessica at 11:50 PM. Post a comment.
March 10, 19
Kris spoke on communication, and it was sooooo good!
Goals of Communication:Posted by Jessica at 9:40 AM. Post a comment.
March 3, 6/7, 19
Caring is an action, not a passive feeling.Posted by Jessica at 12:25 AM. Post a comment.
March 1, 19
I love how freedom and confidence affect each other and build on each other! Freedom builds confidence, while confidence increases and enhances Freedom!Posted by Jessica at 12:12 AM. Post a comment.
Feb. 25/26, 19
Developing our person, gifts and talents isn't a passive process, it's an assertive pursuit that also brings us into greater intimacy with our Daddy-God.. love that!.Posted by Jessica at 12:15 AM. Post a comment.
Feb. 22, 19
Opposing what is false and pursuing the Truth should be done from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith.Posted by Jessica at 11:44 PM. Post a comment.
Feb. 17, 19
I asked Daddy-God a while ago to show me how to feel clean and sweet like I once had felt with a family I knew..I had felt covered, safe, protected and sweet/clean, and had thus begun to enjoy being a girl! Almost immediately after asking Daddy-God for this, I was exposed to the foulest of human behavior (really people?). It felt like this would taint me forever, then I heard very clearly, It's not what you know, it's what you do with what you know. .. This [behavior] comes out of self-centered motives. ..your disgust is similar to how I feel about selfish motives bc of how they dishonor others and degrade their humanity. We were made in His image, which is where our value, freedom, beauty, etc. comes from!
So what do I do with this? Maybe I had felt clean and sweet with that family bc their motives had been pure and honoring, so I can recall what that was like along with some of what I experience now, and make sure that everything I do and say comes from a pure motive to honor, value and Love as He Loves me. .. Life will either make you or break you; depending on your perspective, you will either become a victim or victorious and powerful.Posted by Jessica at 6:06 PM. Post a comment.
Feb. 12, 19
Jesus has the full and complete understanding of what it means to be a son, and since His Spirit lives in us, we are able to see God as our Daddy and grow in our understanding of what it means to be His son/daughter.Posted by Jessica at 11:58 PM. Post a comment.
Feb. 5/6, 19
To be the aroma of Christ!!!!!!!!! :')Posted by Jessica at 12:07 AM. Post a comment.
Jan. 29, 30, 19
Whether people are younger (weaker?) in their faith or have different callings, our faith is going to look different. (Jesus is always the One and True Lord and Savior!) So why do we assume that everyone should be exactly like us and share our convictions? Someone who's called to play in gigs held in bars is going to have to be okay with being around certain things like bad language, while someone else with a different calling may hold a strong conviction against anything off color. Never thought that 'leniency' would be in the Bible, maybe it's not leniency but freedom to fulfill our destinies!Posted by Jessica at 11:55 PM. Post a comment.
Jan. 22-24, 19
I so so love this concept that if we forgive someone, they will be forgiven, even if they haven't asked for forgiveness. I think that when we forgive others who have not asked for forgiveness, this can start them on the road to redemption and freedom! Which I think is one of the most powerful and exciting thing on this planet :)Posted by Jessica at 11:37 PM. Post a comment.
Jan. 4..13, 19
Daddy-God's way of showing me how important it is to have pure and honoring motives for everything has been to let me feel what impure motives do to others. As I was thinking about it, I realized that when our words/actions are honoring and our motives are truly for others' good makes, it less painful if what we've given is not received well.Posted by Jessica at 10:02 PM. Post a comment.
Jan. 1, 19
End of Dec, 18
It seems like Jesus is saying that part of faith is understanding the authority we have in Him and walking in it with the expectation that things will change.Posted by Jessica at 10:56 PM. Post a comment.
Early Dec, 18
Tis the season to do even more good :')Posted by Jessica at 10:04 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 20, 18
Daydreaming/imagining (w/ Holy Spirit, lost in the wonder of Him, i.e. during worship..) is a good way to solidify healthy thot patterns, bc a renewed mind is the beginning to bringing His Kingdom wherever we go.. might be why Ken Medema said that the Kingdom of God begins in our minds. Eric talked about imaginations Sunday morning, and it was such a confirmation of Daddy-God's toughness w/ me on dreaming/imagining in a positive way to change my mind-set and break free from the learned disfunctional patterns. I used to think poor-me thots bc of everything I had experienced, but after I met some who valued my thots, perspectives and feelings and I experienced how it felt to be a valued and honored recipient in healthy interactions, Daddy-God challenged me to dream: You've known for a long time what you never want to do to people.. (defense position) How do you want to love and value people? Dream it into being, until loving, valuing and honoring others as you are experiencing is as natural as breathing. ... (offense position)
Worship is always my sweet spot for daydreaming, and tonight I kept going so long that I wondered why I had come.. anyone would say that I can daydream to worship at home, but it's never the same. Anyway, my mind was off daydreaming/imaginating, and as I wondered why I had come, He showed me something very distinctly. In the last 20/25 years, when I crash and burn, I pretty much don't get hurt, no eggs, no lumps, no broken bones, etc. which gives me a sense of freedom, tho I know can't abuse it and be reckless. I expect to get up, shake it off and be fine within a few minutes, and tonight I suddenly and distinctly understood that I need to be confident and expect Him to provide financially as confidently as I am in the grace He gives me physically.
Nov. 14 & 15, 18
We had 9 exams today, and I miraculously finished coding the Chemistry one for Kurzweil (an application that reads the exam to the student) just as the student walked in..couldn't do it yesterday aftn bc the maintenance and IT guys came to move everything just after the exam came in. Definitely can't do this w/out Him.. His thing of increasing encounters w/ Him before I get out of bed in the morning is so true, increase requires more encounters w/ Him. I gave Him my time before I got up, and He gave me ample time to prep the exam :)Posted by Jessica at 1:50 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 3 & 4, 18
I've been praying for my treasure to have encounters with his Daddy-God as freely as I do, and I was praying this even more yesterday in memory of his daddy .. After worship this morning, they prayed for the children to begin encountering Daddy-God like never before.. our children will know Him and encounter Him even more than we do!Posted by Jessica at 9 AM. Post a comment.
Oct. 21, 22, 23, ..., 18
During worship and as Pastor Bill was talking, the upcoming meeting at work was meandering around in my mind. I had been asked for my approval of the agenda and was looking forward to the possibility of a few upgrades. As I thot about things that were moving forward, I realized that I needed to simultaneously increase my encounter times with Daddy-God, that before I got out of bed in the mornings, I needed to spend time on His lap playing with His fingers and such like I do during worship when I'm not day-dreaming about things He wants me involved in.
So the next morning, I enjoyed a bit of play time with Him before getting ready, and I was miraculously early for work..not sure how bc I got up a few minutes later and am not very coordinated before noon, tho I choose to be happy anyway..if people get my humor, a lot of fun can be had by all, lol. - I have been early or leisurely on-time every day since. Is that His way of showing how to lead, bring His Kingdom as a child?Posted by Jessica at 7:52 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 12..17, 18
It's intriguing to see how the physical realm seems to be the most real of all the realms and is usually the most demanding of our thoughts and attention. When in reality, the spirit realm is the one that should be the most demanding of our thoughts and attention since its Reality is the most real of all the realms bc its existance influences and shapes eveything else.Posted by Jessica at 10:01 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 3, 18
Daddy-God's been reminding of qualities that were seen in me and nurtured long long ago, wanting me to remember them as much as I can so I can continue to develop and grow into the powerful, strong, confident, fun, gentle and tender girl I was created to be. The memory that has filled my mind most lately is the look on "Daddy-Long-Legs" face when he saw it click in my eyes and in the squaring of my shoulders, that I finally realized that he(top person the music department/big name in the university) and I were equals. The stronger and more confident I was in my interactions with him, the happier he was.. He had worked hard for that moment..
I've wondered for a long time why people deal with the emotional and spirit realms so differently from the physical one. Kind of like if someone carelessly swings around a machette and injures someone, the wound is legit and taken care of until it is healed, but if someome carelessly swings around unencouraging words and injures a person, the person isn't suppose to hurt or bleed. As I was thinking about this, Daddy-God gave me a picture.. if someone wants to grow a plant (or a relationship) they need to learn what the plant/person needs to thrive. How moist does the soil need to be? Does the soil need to be well-drained or not? How much sun exposure does the plant need? (The plant or person has to want to thrive..that's a choice.) A plant/relationship can't thrive if cared for/watered how and when the caretaker feels like it..I had a plant that liked to be dry, but not for 4 weeks in a row. "Daddy-Long-Legs" as he called himself "tended" me in the way I needed to grow strong, confident, bold, yet loving and tender, but healing (facing him) and growing was my choice. I loved how they learned the people around them such that when they invited people over.. they would talk about their guests' interests, play the type of music their guests liked, and basically celebrated them while they were all together. Loving someone celebrates him/her in a way that feels and actually is honoring to him/her. So how can tend those around me?Posted by Jessica at 3:44 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 21.. 24, 18
It fascinates me and awes me that Daddy-God, the God of the universe! encourages us to think and explore to find Truth - bc He knows that Truth will always bring us to Him. On the other hand, the enemy wants to deceive us and uses fear and other means to hold us back from pursuing truth because he also knows that all truth will lead to Truth that reveals Daddy-God and will bring us to Him!Posted by Jessica at 2:57 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 19, 18
Pastor Kris talked about how Daddy-God is the God of Restoration, restoring from our high point.. loss doesn't always mean that we have to start all over from the bottom.Posted by Jessica at 2:08 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 12, 18
Tonight as Pastor Bill was talking about Jesus healing the man at the pool of Bethesda, I was thinking about all the loss from the Carr fire and seeing how people's needs are. We can help meet the physical needs and some emotional needs by Loving, valuing and honoring, but only He can meet and heal us all the way. We need people, but Daddy-God has to be our base.Posted by Jessica at 8:30 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 3, 18
This has been an interesting/challenging summer with losing two precious people, not having the hours of work I've needed and being so physically limited with the kind of work I can do, transportation not working, friends being gone, and now the loss of hours from the college being turned into an evacuation center. Each loss effects us differently, some losses bring pain and grief, some strip us of dignity, some can whittle our hope away, etc. But I've been reminded that while giving Him a sacrifice of praise (which we can only give Him now bc in heaven it won't be a sacrifice) may not keep all the pain away, it will keep our hope alive while shutting down fear and anxiety and keeping our losses and pain from damaging/destroying us. It's been funny to watch Him enable me to laugh in situations where it was needed.Posted by Jessica at 3:40 PM. Post a comment.
As I've been doing communion and praying/declaring over my family and my woork, the Truth has been feeling so alive.. that Jesus' blood resets the standard for His Kingdom, destiny, dreams to become reality.Posted by Jessica. Post a comment.
June 25-29, 18
Daddy-God's been reminding me of where I've been bc we are to be constantly growing and moving in Him, higher and higher, from [one degree of] glory to [even more] glory. So when we have set-backs, our expectation should be to move higher than we were at our highest point, not just higher than where we presently are. He can make they way.Posted by Jessica at 11:52 PM. Post a comment.
June 15, 17.. 21, 18
Unforgiveness is harsh. David had an affair with the daughter of one of his Mighty Men and the granddaughter of his own counselor. Ahithophel apparently never forgave David for having the affair or for the murder of his grandson-in-law, purhaps his rage grew bc he ended up siding with Absolom and plotting against the king. When he saw that his advice wasn't followed, did he know that David would come out victorious and he a traitor? Is that what he couldn't live with? Yet God, Eliam, Bathsheba did forgive him, celebrating his victories and Solomon's position as the next king.Posted by Jessica. Post a comment.
June 7, 18
This caught my attention.. Daddy-God can change our hearts, but we have to do the work needed to maintain or further develop the change He started. Saul didn't, but David and many others did.Posted by Jessica at 11:52 PM. Post a comment.
May 27-31, 18
When we're facing challenging situations and the enemy is trying to overwhelm us with his input, we must look for what Daddy-God is saying/doing and absorb Him so fully that the enemy goes quiet. Our confidence can only be in Him!Posted by Jessica at 11:36 PM. Post a comment.
May 19, 18
As I've been working with students in the PACE program at Shasta College, it's been so intriguing to me to realize that if I'm going to help students succeed, I have to deal with my own issues. When we don't deal with our own insecurities, pains, sorrows and other issues, we can actually limit the people around us. That's probably why Sadie asked me at the very beginning of working at Compass if I had gone through sozos, bc she knew that if I wasn't dealing with my own issues, that I would limit the clients and staff I work with..very wise :)Posted by Jessica at 8:04 PM. Post a comment.
May 4..., 18
Spend time with people who sharpen you and are growing in the direction you are going.Posted by Jessica. Post a comment.
April 30, 18
When faced with an overwhelming Mountain to overcome ask, Daddy-God what He's doing and how to start. Someone welcomed me to go say hello to their daughter who had just started working as a cashier, and I felt overwhelmed because I didn't want to make her uneasy, not everybody takes to me. As I was listening for what He's doing Today, He gave me a word for her, which makes going to say hello easier and not overwhelming.Posted by Jessica at 3:33 PM. Post a comment.
April 26, 18
With summer coming and the weather warming up, I really don't feel well until my honey, chocolate and coffee kick in. I feel rather useless and out of it bc it feels like I'm trying to move with a hundred pound weight on me, I'm so tired, and my muscles burn whenever I use them. Yet even so, I was reminded that I can still love and honor the person in front of me.. bc it's a heart thing that doesn't require much effort when it's a natural response. Natural responses come as a result of habits and patterns, so when we make it a point to love and honor every person we speak to, it will become a part of our nature, something we'll do automatically. No matter how we're feeling or what's going on, there's always room to love and honor the one the one in front of us.Posted by Jessica at 10:19 AM. Post a comment.
April 10-16, 18
Why is God's dwelling designed the way it is at the end of Exodus, 2 Kings and Ezekiel 40-48?
The temple faced east, facing the new day, and water flowed out from the temple, flowing east and giving life to the land it flowed thru.
In Ezekiel's vision of the temple, there was only the Most Holy Place (Holy of Holies) with a table-like alter for incense/our prayers, no Holy Place with its lampstand or table with bread, bc the veil had been torn at Jesus' death and He is the light, the bread, and also the Mercy Seat and the safe place. Posted by Jessica at 8:50 PM. Post a comment.Inside the temple on the left was a lampstand made out of pure gold that was the light for the temple, Jesus is the Light of the world and He illuminates our minds so that we can know Daddy-God.
End of March - April 8, 18
Tonight Hayley talked about the process of how thot patterns and beliefs are formed. Another part that we are responsible for is aligning our inner world, thot patterns and beliefs with all that Daddy-God is. Hayley's scientific explanation of how we get to what we believe and our thot patterns was intriguing bc it's precisely why Daddy-God's always pushing me to daydream. It started with daydreaming about chit-chatting at ease with Jerry's dad and making him laugh when I first met him bc all I knew was to duck and hide. By the time I met Jerry, I was able to look them in the eye and speak more freely. Now it's feeling the authority and strength I should be walking in without worrying about all the ways it could be misinterpreted or sideswiped. After the service, He gave me a fun banter with a friend who is comfortable with a girl being powerful, and I was ingraining the healthy two-way interaction and freedom to be strong into my being when a few other such friends walked by. It's all a process!Posted by Jessica at 11:57 PM. Post a comment.
March 26, 18
Daddy-God wants a relationship with us and to accomplish His purposes and desires thru a partnership with us. This means that we need to know Him, what He's thinking and what He wants from us by spending time with Him every day. I'm suppose to live with hope, so if I lose my hope, my part is to surround myself with things that bring me hope, like watching testimonies of restoration, playing worship, reading the Word and promises He's given me, etc. His part is showing up..Posted by Jessica at 7:53 PM. Post a comment.
February 25 - March 19, 18
How alive, connected and a positive contributor do we want to be? I've been frustrated at how much I function every day and can't seem to move into living life like I used to. It's also been frustrating to have people think I'm doing great when I'm so far below where I used to be, so I put it into numbers that can be easier to understand -20s Basic needs for being alive - air, water, food, sleep, clothing, shelter
30s Safety needs - personal security, financial security, health and well-being, safety against harmful incidents
40s Love/Belonging - friendships, intimacy, family .. Esteem - desire to be accepted and valued by others
50s-100 Self-actualization - realization/desire to fulfill one's potential, role in others' lives, in the world around one, and to empower others to their own self-actualization
For the most part, for life up thru the higher 40s, we seek things outside of ourselves to fulfill our needs, which then determine our level of functionality. Since I don't have what I need to do the physical functioning parts of life easily, these basic things take all of my concentration, like walking to my work area and putting my things away. Without the help I need to make doing things easier, I don't have enough brain space to interact very much with the world around me, like greeting a coworker, noticing by their face what kind of a morning they've had and being able to respond apropriately. Focusing on basic needs makes working on inner growth and empowering others highly unlikely. Everything above 50 seems to involve inner growth, emotional healing and a lot of internal work in order gain the ability to contribute to world around us in a significant way. Living above the 50s makes me feel alive and fulfilled bc I know how I can give significant contributions and empower others to do the same! This leaves me with the question: how can we support people with disabilities who struggle with various parts of life in a way that will empower them to live as full a life as they can?Posted by Jessica at 1:40 PM.. Post a comment.
March 9 - 14, 18
I've seen what living life abundantly looks like..abundance in provision of needs, deep understanding of self and others, strong ability to manage self and empower others to manage themselves, and insight and wisdom in using connections to change atmospheres. So what is functioning vs living?
March 5, 18
Our internal choices affect around us. When we get hit with anxiety, fear, depression or anything the enemy hits us with, it affects those around us. I walked into a house where the person was filled with anxiety and I could feel fear hitting me at every angle. So once I could tell that everything was fine externally, I started lifting His Name in worship, and peace came, the person relaxed and dozed off and the atmosphere was filled with Peace and Hope!Posted by Jessica at 1:40 PM. Post a comment.
February 22, 18
Every aspect of life is important and reveals who our Father is, but Love is what saved us and is what everything comes from. So anything, even astronomy, that doesn't embody Love won't accurately display His Nature.Posted by Jessica at 1:40 PM. Post a comment.
February 18, 18
Pastor Bill is so good at explaining the logic of things..he was just explaining how what we fear becomes what we worship. What we fear influences our words, our actions and how we think and feel if we allow it, which is a form of bowing in worship and allowing it to control us.Posted by Jessica at 9:00 PM. Post a comment.
February 14, 18
Life is about seeing and hearing what the Father is doing and saying concerning the people around us, then partnering w/ Him to carry out our part. Emotional intelligence intrigues me bc it involves managing ourselves in a healthy way and being perceptive, reading the people around us and intuiting how to interact and respond to needs, ideas, dreams, etc. in a healthy and honoring way ..sounds very Kingdom to me ;')Posted by Jessica at 10:55 PM. Post a comment.
February 11, 18
Eric spoke tonight and talked about going deep, and how Jesus had showed him to years ago that if he went deep in his relationship with Him (righteousness, peace and joy, who we are in Him) that He would take care of the width aspect (food, drink, things we do). Like trees, we must grow our roots deep in order to be able to weather storms without toppling over.Posted by Jessica at 9:00 PM. Post a comment.
February 2, 18
As I was cleaning up the yard, I felt Daddy God say pray what you know. Since I have studied the basics of how each organ in the body functions, I felt like He said that I have the authority to command those organs to function the way they were created to. Meaning I can tell the immune system to produce more white blood cells to strengthen the body and kill the cancer cells and send them out of the body. I can tell the colon to get a move on and remove everything this is not supposed to be there and send it out of the body. So I have been praying these things.Posted by Jessica at 2:00 PM. Post a comment.
January 28, 18
Ever since I was young, I've known that I have to do my part, and Daddy-God will take care of the rest, but losing so much has taken the life out of my faith that prayer is effective. As we've been praying for a friend, Daddy-God's been on me to see, feel and believe what I'm praying for, that in this fight my part is to pray with full-force, expecting what I'm believing for to happen.Posted by Jessica at 6:00 PM. Post a comment.
January 24, 18
Our hearts, ie attitudes and motives, are what Daddy-God looks at bc everything we do and say is colored by our attitudes and motives.Posted by Jessica at 11:20 AM. Post a comment.
January 21, 18
As I was thinking about pursuing relationships where I am empowered to grow, the freedom in that was exhileration. So I wondered how we know when circumstances are hard bc they're building character or bc they're unhealthy and we need to move on? .. I felt Daddy-God say that it's in our attitude and how yeilded we are. If we're annoyed, angry, bitter, etc. or feel that we're better than...., we probably haven't gotten His heart for the people/situation we're trying to get away from, which probably means He's not moving us on yet. When we are ok w/ staying and feel His Love and heart for the people/situation, but the circumstance is beccoming too difficult, it may mean that His grace to be in the situation has begun to lift bc it's time to move on.Posted by Jessica at 4:15 PM. Post a comment.
January 9, 10, ... 18
My muscles have been getting tighter and twitching more bc I don't have what they need to relax, and as I continue moving forward into becoming who I was created to be the twitching is increasing. It's reminded me of how a similar thing happened a year ago when I couldn't handle my creepy drivers any more. New doors were opening, and I sensed that Daddy-God was changing one of my unhealthy environments so that I could move forward with more freedom. Becoming healthier, freer and more healed is a must before we can move further into all we were created for, I.e. we must drop the gutter behaviors, patterns and garb before we can participate in palace activities. I couldn't freely encourage and love on the people Daddy-God put on my heart when I was working on desliming myself from the driver who brought me there. I knew that the grace to deal with it was ending as the creepiness began causing me to lose my appetite.. I was soon able to have a better and healthier way to get to work and do my job.
So now, as I continue moving forward, my muscles are twitching out of control bc I don't have regular healthy interactions, which is crucial for living in the palace and having palace relationships. The grace to be around so many people who have anger issues and unhealthy mindsets is waning, and this means I need to start going after being around healthy people and developing healthy relationships..bc the enemy certainly isn't going to just allow them to freely come to me, empower me, and strengthen me against him. Lol. We need to actively go after getting what we need for who Daddy God wants us to be and all that He wants us to do, instead of limiting ourselves to do what we're able to do with what we currently have.Posted by Jessica. Post a comment.
January 7, 18
Kingdom Truth is that the blessings we've received are to be released to others for their benefit, not just ours..Kingdom multiplication. Jesus said, I give you the keys to the Kingdom. This was such a confirmation of the word I gave a few days ago..releasing the blessings we've received is Kingdom multiplication.Posted by Jessica at 12:30 PM. Post a comment.
End of December into the new year, January 4 & 5, 18
My book went up tonight! It has definitely been a learning experience bc I decided at the beginning that I was going to finish it by the end of the year, but not at the expense of those around me. I didn't want to miss experiences and opportunities to honor time with my mom, niece, nephews or giving a word to those Daddy-God is highlighting just for the sake of finishing my book. So my book's copyright is 2017, but it's up for purchase today.Posted by Jessica. Post a comment.
Dec. 13, 17
Had a realization as I was thinking about what had happened on Sun., and as I thot about it, even tho I felt Jenn sensed that I don't carry any bitterness, anger, resentment, jealousy, .. I could almost hear her say that her responsibility is to love and honor, and my responsibility is to not be bitter, angry, jealous, etc..tears are fine, wrong attitude is not. It was a clear picture, even tho I was the recipient, that my responsibility is to love and honor period, not react or even wonder how to react to the other person.Posted by Jessica at 9:48 AM. Post a comment.
Dec. 10, 17
I saw Jenn with Rider this morning as she was giving him to someone, and I choked up a bit bc I'll never have my children to love, raise up and send off into the world.. Didn't think I had been seen, but then I saw Jenn coming around the back on her way to get coffee at Hebrews. She greeted me warmly with a comforting hug even tho I had tried to be unaware of her in order to give her space. It was a loving and comforting response not only bc of what she gave me, but it was also comforting to have my love and pouring into her honored..quite different from a response I had had with some others. - I felt like Daddy-God was showing me what should have been done earlier, and that when we're healing, we often know what not to do and how not to approach something, but that doesn't mean we know the healthy way it should be done. So we need to ask Daddy-God to show us the right or healthy way to approach/handle situations.Posted by Jessica at 11:20 AM. Post a comment.
Dec. 3, 17
Hadn't really thot about this until Pastor Bill said it this morning - Our passions that are worth pursuing are those that are fulfilled by His Presence, bc if we can't bring Him into what we're doing/enjoying/pursuing, we probably shouldn't go there. Why stir up passions and pursuits that He can't be a part of?Posted by Jessica at 9:22 AM. Post a comment.
Nov. 26, 17
Kris spoke this morning on how to create a culture and how a culture is created by the strongest consistent influence. If you put a pot of hot coffee in a cold refrigerator, the coffee will become cold unless it stays plugged in to a heat source. Since we are here to bring the Kingdom and change the environment we walk into, we have to stay in tune and plugged in to Daddy-God in order to be a thermostat in the environment not a thermometer.Posted by Jessica at 5:57 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 22, 17
If we want to become who we were created to be, we have to choose to spend time with people who will sharpen us in that direction.Posted by Jessica at 1:10 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 15, 16, ..19, 17
When our identity is in being Daddy-God's favorite, and we can give Him that sacrifice of praise, circumstances might be painful, but they won't be destructive.. bc worship keeps us rightly aligned such that nothing we go thru will take us down. I remember when the enemy would torment me with what he was doing to Jerry, I would praise Jesus every time the pain ripped me bc our time on earth is our only chance to give Him a sacrifice of praise and I wanted only Him to receive the attention and worship.. and I wanted to keep anger, bitterness, etc away. Daddy-God would also urge me to dream with Him about encouraging Jerry and making him laugh. I think that is the only reason why I made it thru those years with my mental health intact.Posted by Jessica at 9:28 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 12, 17
Eric talked about choosing your battles, and it made me think about how important it is to make a conscious decision on what to give grace to (nicely give up a close parking spot) and what to stand up and fight for (someone's name and reputation that's being muddied).Posted by Jessica at 9:49 AM. Post a comment.
Nov. 9, 17
Realized tonight that one reason why the state of our hearts is what's so important is that what's in our hearts can be seen in our eyes. My eyes can only show love, honor and value for the person I'm talking w/ if my heart does.Posted by Jessica at 11:51 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 2, 17
When we are jealous of someone else, it might be bc we haven't figured out our significance as Daddy-God's favorite.Posted by Jessica at 12:49 AM. Post a comment.
Oct. 29, 17
Pastor Bill's comment this morning made me think about what I value.. Jesus didn't fall into temptation bc His value system was different.Posted by Jessica at 11:45 AM. Post a comment.
Oct. 27, 17
Just had this thot that part of understanding what Daddy-God is saying and doing requires us to know ourselves so that we can see the signs within ourselves that seasons are changing and that He is shifting things. I knew that my season of going to work with creepy drivers was over when I started losing my appetite bc of the stress.Posted by Jessica. Post a comment.
Oct. 22, 17
Tom Crandall just shared a story that made me realize . . if the enemy knows who we are and feels threatened, we had better know who we are and the authority Jesus has given us and walk in it!Posted by Jessica at 6:15 PM. Post a comment.
Oct. 15, 17
Kris put it so simply - Conviction says we did something wrong; shame says we are something wrong.Posted by Jessica at 9:15 AM. Post a comment.
Oct. 11, 17
There's no way around it. Words are either healing and strengthening to the core of who we are, or they're that deeply destructive.Posted by Jessica at 2:48 PM. Post a comment.
Oct. 8, 17
As I was enjoying and soaking in the worship time tonight, I was feeling so grateful to be able to be here where our worship leaders worship as they lead like Jerry did. On the outside a person who performs and a person who is completely yielded to Daddy-God often appear almost indistinguishable. But when we fully yield to Him, we open the way for Him to flow and work thru us to a hugely greater degree than if we try to make Him happen.Posted by Jessica at 7:35 PM. Post a comment.
Oct. 1, 17
It's funny how people use this verse to tell someone who's struggling that all the person needs is God, but that's not what the verse says! We need to go to Daddy-God first for everything bc only He can meet our needs and fill us from the very depths of our being, and bc only He knows how to provide for our needs. For those who look to have their needs met thru what's around them, He may completely meet their needs w/ Himself and His provision. Others like myself who have been hurt only want Him, so He meets a lot of our needs thru people bc we need to see our need for relationships and bc we've already been filled 95% of the way by Him.Posted by Jessica at 10:38 AM. Post a comment.
Sept. 21, 22, 23, .., 17
Freedom is a choice, and doors into freedom are often not easy to walk thru bc of the distractions, fears.. Even tho not everyone is goal oriented, we all must keep our eyes on the direction/place Daddy-God is calling us to and not allow distractions to sidetrack us from where we need to be going.Posted by Jessica at 12:08 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 17, 17
Pastor Bill talked about how our experiences give us a key to a realm of heaven that we can access from then on, and how true that is! It made me think of when I first experienced oneness...
I've yearned for oneness ever since I can remember, and when the Lord first showed me what it was like to have someone feel w/ me what I felt, I wanted to give that amazingness back to Him. So I asked Him to deepen and expand my heart as far as it could go bc I wanted to be able to feel w/ Him what He feels as much as I humanly could, and He is granting me my request. He also began to show me the healing properties of oneness as well as the things that can be accomplished when people unite together as one.
Years ago, as I was holding my keys and moving them w/ my lips to find the right one, my treasure said, "I don't know how to help you. I want to be inside your thots." I told him I didn't think about needing help and that he could come in if he wanted, so he did. As I did things, like hanging up shirts, he would slide in and do the right hand part w/ perfection w/out having to ask how. (People either don't help, or do it for me instead of w/ me.) I tried hard not to stare at him, and if it weren't for the fact I knew his parents, I'd wonder if he had any. It was beyond trippy to be of one mind like that and to come to know what it's like to have two hands working together as tho I had been healed. It was also amazing to have my balance improve and my muscles relax so I could sleep nine hours straight. I can't be the only human on this ball of water who improves physically (and all the other ways) thru oneness. What if Holy Spirit-led oneness heals people physically, emotionally, mentally, psychologically, spiritually, etc.?Posted by Jessica at 12:08 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 10, 17
I have found that the enemy likes to remain hidden, disguised and unnoticed so that he can work.. might be one reason why we don't like exposing things, esp. in safe environments. I've also found that exposing him (w/out giving him too much attention) shuts him up.. Years ago, when he would get in my head w/ torments of what he was getting away w/, I'd send a quick message to a friend simply to expose him and shut him up. She'd text back how easy it was for Daddy-God to fix it (Truth), which readjusted my perspective and silenced him up every time (Freedom). When our identity isn't in how hard our problem is but in Who He is and who we are in Him, it is easy for Daddy-God to fix.Posted by Jessica at 10:44 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 2, .. 6, 17
It's been interesting to observe how much we limit ourselves when we won't deal with issues.. It can end up limiting us like a disability. We are called to be free.Posted by Jessica at 3:08 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 27, 17
I've been realizing lately how much our choices determine the level of freedom we walk in. We have choices in how much we want to grow and heal, and we'll pretty much rarely "feel like" doing the very thing that will bring us freedom. In order to heal from being misread I have to trust the new people and circumstances that Daddy-God brings so that I can learn to interact w/ confidence the way He created me to. Learning and developing new patterns can be overwhelming, and sometimes the only way to face opportunities to do so requires us to keep our eyes on the desired result, freedom! If we avoid these opportunities to grow and heal for whatever reason, we're not trusting Him, which only prolongs our own misery.Posted by Jessica at 4:25 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 11, .. 18, 17
Honoring others can't happen w/out working thru our own inner healing, and inner healing is a choice. The first choice is the decision to acknowledge the issue and that healing is needed, then from there it's choosing to forgive, move on and learn/develop healthy patterns that will result in valuing ourselves in a way that brings about the ability to be devoted to others and honor them above ourselves. None of these things happen on their own, each one is a choice. I'm meeting w/ two authority figures in a few weeks.. I've healed enough to be confident and have no fear about meeting w/ them, but I still need to learn how to have the right mix of strength, confidence, honor and respect. The only way the learn and grow in this area is to face these kinds of interactions and learn from them.Posted by Jessica at 1:22 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 7, 17
Growing in who we were created to be is one of the most exhilarating and freeing things we can do. So being around those who encourage and empower our growth is crucial, as it is being ones who are strong enough in who we are to empower and encourage others to be all they were created to be. Wings were made for soaring...Posted by Jessica at 3:13 PM. Post a comment.
July 25, 17
I enjoy people's uniquenesses bc every single person is a unique reflection of their Creator, so I love love love how everyone around us is showing us a unique side of Daddy-God. Maybe this is why there's a part of Him that we can only access thru other people.Posted by Jessica at 12:25 PM. Post a comment.
July 13 & 14, 17
A phrase has been coming up on Air1 - we can't become who we were created to be w/out other people - and it goes along w/ a concept I've been working out.. The company we keep not only influences us, but it also determines our patterns of thinking. If I want to Love and Honor those around me and grow in that, I can't spend time w/ those who laugh at others and keep themselves at the top and better than others. If I want to grow and learn healthy patterns, I need to spend time w/ healthy people..being around people who are where we want to be can be scary, intimidating, uncomfortable, etc. bc their healthy patterns are an unknown. But! unkowns are only scary until they become knowns/familiar healthy patterns!!Posted by Jessica at 8:48 PM. Post a comment.
July 9, 17
As Eric was talking about Peter's passion and the disciples' desire for greatness this morning it made me smile.. Jesus isn't afraid of our passions or desires bc He can redirect/channel them into a Kingdom direction..we should have a desire to be great, but w/ child-likeness and a servant's heart.Posted by Jessica at 9:35 AM. Post a comment.
July 4, 17
July has seemed daunting on its approach bc of how different my schedule's going to be..will there be cars and people available at the right times and places so that each task can be accomplished successfully? (Of course there will be.) It's also summer and over 80 :D, so I don't feel very spry..how do I have positive thots when it's too late in the day for more coffee? Daddy-God reminded me tonight about choosing to think about those things I'm looking forward to instead of how I'm feeling, like thinking about hopefully being able to discuss a few ideas and let my brain fly tomorrow. :')Posted by Jessica at 11:33 PM. Post a comment.
June 30, 17
Growing, learning and changing is always a good mode to develop into a comfort zone :')Posted by Jessica at 3:44 PM. Post a comment.
June 19, 22 & 25, 17
Pastor Bill was talking about praise this morning as I was writing this out.. For the past little while, Daddy-God has been reminding of some things I have lost, which had begun to fade as I've been trying to steward things well and be content w/ where I've landed. So I've begun to realize that sometimes moving forward involves being aware of our losses to realize the base we need to start from not aim for. He is the God of justice/vindication, restoration and payback w/ interest, altho the payback and restoration may look different from what was lost. - He can't be held back by the enemy's work unless we allow it.
I lost a high paying job where I had been a supervisor, not necessarily a position most people would assume I would have, so the loss was hard as I sunk down to what most expected my life to be. But He wanted me to stand and fight, like I was fighting for my treasures more then ever at that time as well, and bc I took a stand, 11 others came forward. After an investigation was made, the person at the top was let go, and everyone's work environment greatly improved. I didn't get my job back, but I had started the ball rolling which brought others freedom. The process and conflict was beyond horrible as was losing my treasures, and I learned that praising and worshipping Jesus was the only way to stay mentally healthy thru the pain, conflict and loss. Focusing on praising Him w/ enough gusto to drown out the enemy's torment and tauntings kept my brain intact even tho it felt like it was cracking. It also taught me discipline, which empowered me to keep fighting to the end. Praising Him empowers us to be powerful and victorious instead of weak victims.Posted by Jessica at 9:43 AM. Post a comment.
June 14, 17
Our private decisions determine the amount of positive or negative life, hope and energy that we give off to those around us. I suppose you could say that I inspire people bc I don't give up, and I in turn am inspired and strengthened by others who stay in the fight. I can feel my drive to push on thru diminish when I am around people who only want to put forth the least amount of effort and energy required, which means that I/we need to choose to be around driven people enough to keep the drive alive in us.Posted by Jessica at 11:28 PM. Post a comment.
June 11, 17
Chris O spoke tonight and shared stories about his journey in learning obedience, and it was very encouraging and confirming as Daddy-God's been putting things on my heart to step out and do. He told a story about seeing a door w/ a person who needed healing and going to find them, but the door that ended up being highlighted wasn't exactly what he had originally seen, yet it was the right door. Everything is about relationship and partnership w/ Daddy-God, not neceesarily accomplishing a task..when we have something we sense we are suppose to do, it's about staying checked in w/ Him from beginning to end, since we never know if He may want to change things a little in the process. Sooo thus, we must continuously check in, even tho we think we know what we're suppose to be doing. ;')Posted by Jessica at 11:40 PM. Post a comment.
June 6, 17
Had a thot that made me think of the above verse.. Daddy-God can change everything, bring us out of hellish circumstances and into environments where we can heal, but we can't heal if we don't internalize the good. He can bring me into an envirnment where I am free and encoureaged to share my thots and ideas, but if I don't internalize the new reality that I am valued and what I think and see matters, I'll never fully heal or be able to participate and contribute what I was created to bring to the table.Posted by Jessica at 12:04 PM. Post a comment.
June 4, 17
We can't move up if we're not willing to serve at the feet of those who are where we are moving up to.Posted by Jessica at 9:12 . Post a comment.
May 24, 25, .. 29, 17
Once again, it's always about the state of our hearts.. When change is cooming, we may feel a restlessness as Daddy-God prepares us for what He has next, but the prep work is usually at the heart level. As the fit becomes more uncomfortable, He is watching how we respond and how we keep our Love and Honor for others on in the midst of our uncomfortable/agitated restlessness.Posted by Jessica at 2:58 PM. Post a comment.
May 21, 17
Brian talked about worship tonight and how worship must cost us something..is it worship if it doesn't cost us something? It intrigued me to think that a simple decision, like the decision to not say something that's not Loving or honoring is, an act of worship.Posted by Jessica at 10:06 PM. Post a comment.
May 17, 17
It's not about what we have or where we are in life, it's about what we do w/ what we have and where we are.Posted by Jessica at 11:55 PM. Post a comment.
May 13, 17
Living life on the offense instead of from a defensive position means doing the Loving thing to honor others no matter what they do..still doing what we had planned to Love and honor someone who forgot that something had been plannned, and leaving it for them to find. Playing on the offense brings the Kingdom.Posted by Jessica at 11:30 PM. Post a comment.
May 10, 17
Progress always seems to look different than we think it should probably bc Daddy-God wants to work on heart issues while we're wanting to see external things change. Having life be challenging has created in me desire to be a safe place of comfort and encouragement for people, but instead of showing me how to Love and comfort people, Daddy-God's been showing me my need for people and how to acknowledge my need for people and healthy relationsahips w/out being needy. We can't be healthy, encourage, Love and honor people well when we're needy.Posted by Jessica at 10 PM. Post a comment.
May 8, 17
Being confident about where we are in our journeys and that Daddy-God will finish all that He began in and thru us is another part of being healthy..Posted by Jessica at 8:28 PM. Post a comment.
May 4, 17
There's always room to learn new things and grow, something my dear boy was always open to. Seeing his excitement over discovering new things was exhilarating to me and showed me how freeing it is to get over our insecurities so that we can learn new things and expand ourselves. Learning and growing requires confidence and boldness to move forward in becoming who we were created to be, which is a whole other level of freedom!Posted by Jessica at 11:10 PM. Post a comment.
April 29, 17
Just had this thot, emapthizing w/ the one in front of us makes it very difficult to shoo them off and not help.Posted by Jessica at 9:41 PM. Post a comment.
April 19, 17
I saw Before I Fall this afternoon about how a girl lived her last day. If today is our last day on earth, how would we live it?Posted by Jessica at 4:44 PM. Post a comment.
April 16, 17
Towards the end of first service this morning, I was thinking about how nice it'll be in eternity when the truth about my dearest love is known. I had begun to feel like I'll have to wait until we're all in eternity to have the truth be known and our families restored, but Daddy-God started challenging that thot as Kris was talking about Lazarus. I know He can prove my innocence and back all I have stood for, but I've lost my zeal to fight bc things in the natural are so horribly contrary. While Kris was talking, Daddy-God started giving me hope with how He can back the stand I had taken, and then He started showing me why they need me in their lives. Right after that, Kris finished with having us stand if we're facing something that's dead, so I stood..Posted by Jessica at 10:30 PM. Post a comment.
April 13, 17
Going after Daddy-God makes us dependent on Him and increasingly healthy in our relationships w/ others. This is bc our destinies fit who we were created to be in a partnership w/ Him, meaning - there's no way we can accomplish all we were created to do on our own. Going after Him is all about embracing Him and Who He is along w/ the cries of His heart, which is that we bring His Kingdom and His Love into every situation and relationship we find ourselves in. Bringing His Kingdom and Love involves selfless pouring of ourselves w/ healthy boundaries.Posted by Jessica at 6:26 PM. Post a comment.
April 8, 17
Carrying Daddy-God's and bringing his kingdom into every circumstance has been on my heart lately, and as I was thinking about it this afternoon and tonight, it seemed so simple. Bringing the Kingdom into every situation we find ourselves in simply means bringing Love however that looks.Posted by Jessica at 9:22 PM. Post a comment.
April 5, 17
I've been taking communion every day instead of doing the fast, and I can't escape this thot - if Jesus gave up His place, His rights and even His very life for me, how can I not give Him everything?Posted by Jessica at 11:03 PM. Post a comment.
April 2, 17
Eric continued talking about being a friend of God.. A partnership w/ Daddy-God is where we catch His heart on a matter and partner w/ Him to fulfill His purposes. To be a friend of God involves a confidence and boldness bc we understand His purposes and His heart enough to confront Him.Posted by Jessica at 5:03 PM. Post a comment.
March 22 & 28, 17
Every single thing, task, aspect of our lives matters to Daddy-God. True, we are to use the mind, heart, spirit and body that He's given us, but when we hit a wall or run out of ideas, He doesn't expect us to pull it together and figure it out on our own..He has the best solution. I've been helping to clean a house, and I don't particularly enjoy being screamed at in the process, so my goal has been to get things done w/out episodes.. I'm loving how He keeps giving me ideas, like bringing a pot of dirt to plant flowers in so that I can put it in a basket on a little table that both needed to be moved outside :) Or bringing a dish mat, so that I can organize papers, clean the countertop and remove the old one. He works in mysterious ways....Posted by Jessica at 11:58 PM. Post a comment.
March 19, 17
Sundays are definitely a down time for me since I get to end my work-week w/ a good soak in Daddy-God's Presence by being immersed in good music and surrounded by precious friends who inspire me to grow and pursue my destiny. This morning, something I've been observing in others' lives finally clicked into my heart's understanding of how to apply in it my own life. Bringing the Kingdom to earth isn't just a theory, it's a way of life that requires speaking words and taking action in ways that are filled w/ wisdom, insight and genuine Love and Honor along w/ Loving boundaries. As I was thinking about this, I felt the unspoken stance of "This will not be said or done on my watch," while loving and honoring the one in front of us, then I remembered when I had observed just that. Someone had heard some unkind laughter going on and had said something like, let's not poke fun at someone when they're not here to defend themselves. Hearing that was like a breath of fresh air..it was simple and straightforward, and a standard was set w/out anyone being ostracized. I loved it! And for some reason it clicked this morning as I began to see how I can speak and set a standard in a Loving and Honoring way.Posted by Jessica at 1:41 PM. Post a comment.
March 14, 17
Even tho life can be challenging and moments can be painful, Daddy-God's comfort is priceless. The eyes and smile from a friend tonight was a comfort that is keeping me going thru a painful realization.Posted by Jessica at 11:40 PM. Post a comment.
v March 10, 17
Daddy-God usually doesn't give us something to do that we're already fit for. From my experience, He usually shows me what do He wants me to do by providing me with what I need to do it, provision and confirmation. As I realize the enormity of what He's asking me to do, the only way I will be able to do it is to become the person that He sees me becoming, the person He created me to be and the person required to be able to do what He's asking me to do. I must change in order to do what He's asking me to do.Posted by Jessica at 11:48 PM. Post a comment.
March 7, 17
It's constantly amazing to me how Daddy-God is so faithful to give us what we need to be able to do what He's asked of us. .. During my years in college and while I was with my treasures, I learned healthy patterns, which I knew wasn't only for my enjoyment. I was to be a carrier and bring healthy patterns into all my relationships. So when I lost my treasures, I told Daddy-God that I needed to be in healthy relationships in order to stay healthy, continue to grow and bring healthy patterns into all my relationships..and this He has done. He has brought me into relationships w/ several healthy people from work and church, including a lively encourager who ushers me into the Presence (lol) and Pa. Bill, and they all definitely keep me on my toes. So even tho I am alone now, I must still bring healthy Kingdom patterns into the relationships around me.Posted by Jessica at 10:53 PM. Post a comment.
March 3, 17
Last night, as I began working on the stories I have with my treasures, it amazed me to see all the things Daddy-God was doing w/ me to show me what He was doing in our situation and how I needed to be praying. There were those who wanted me to leave things alone bc they were looking at the external circumstances. Yet I always ran into my treasures in places and circumstances I didn't plan on or expect bc Daddy-God was doing something else, something that only a few people/leaders could see. I'm glad that I didn't miss what He was doing bc I found out that my dearest treasure had felt and was holding onto my love and value for him.. and that he had held on for as long as he could.Posted by Jessica at 9:55 PM. Post a comment.
Feb. 26, 17
Eric talked about Moses' burning bush encounter this morning, and I've known that Daddy-God is whatever we need..I Am your bread, I Am your strength, I Am your etc. But Eric was talking about how Moses needed to be good w/ what he was called to do simply bc God exists. We are good, able to.. bc He is/exists.Posted by Jessica at 10:45 PM. Post a comment.
Feb. 24, 17
These verses caught my attention bc I sensed in their wordiness, which felt confusing, there was treasure that I didn't want to miss --
His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and goodness. Through His glory and goodness He has given us His very great and precious promises, so that through His very great and precious promises you may participate in the divine nature, and escaped the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.Posted by Jessica at 11:47 PM. Post a comment.
Feb. 20, 17
I love how Daddy-God gives us tender things to show us that He is aware of what we're thinking about and extra Loves to keep us tender and loving when things are hard. Today is my treasure's birthday, and that has a bite to it bc I haven't seen him since he was little.. so since I can't put him to bed and kiss him good night, I declare things over him. Yesterday was a full day - Bill talked about speaking/declaring things, then I got to see a friend and her family, several others, and Bill with hugs twice, morning and evening, which never happens. It'll be interesting to see what declarations are added for my not-so-little treasure this next year.Posted by Jessica at 10:20 PM. Post a comment.
Feb. 16, 17
As I read this this morning, I was hit w/ the simplicity in Loving, honoring and valuing the one in front of us. We can Love, honor and value the one in front of us by taking the time and care to focus on them, connect w/ them and be interested in what's going on in their world as we're interacting w/ them. Meaning take the time and care to focus, connect w/ and be interested in what's going on in the world of every single person we interact w/, every single time. Honoring, Loving and valuing the one in front of involves our eyes and our expression as well as our words, bc our eyes won't be bright and cheerful if our hearts aren't feeling it. So.. a cheerful look will bring joy to their heart as they feel honored, Loved and truly valued. :')Posted by Jessica at 11:03 PM. Post a comment.
Feb. 5-11, 17
Daddy-God gives us the grace and favor to be in tough/unhealthy situations as for as long as He has a purpose for us being there, and then either the situation will improve or it will become time for us to move on (His grace will lift, and the situation will begin to pull us down/become destructive.) To stay in His grace and favor, we need to follow His wisdom in order to be where we are suppose to be. I've been feeling the grace to deal w/ rough drivers begin to lift, and at the same time doors of promotion have begun to open. It felt like He was showing me that as we go higher into our destinies, we may not have the grace to stay in unhealthy circumstances or rough situations that do not improve..bc the higher we go, the more crucial it is that what we contribute is pure and healthy, the Kingdom. We can't be bringing residue from ongoing unhealthy situations if we want to continue to move into increasingly prominant arenas.Posted by Jessica at 4:23 PM. Post a comment.
Feb. 2, 17
I find it intriguing that we will find what we look for in life, in people, etc. To the pure, all things are pure, but to those who are corrupted and do not believe, nothing is pure.(Titus 1:15)Posted by Jessica at 11:23 AM. Post a comment.
Jan. 24, 17
To the faithful You show Yourself faithful,
It fascinates me how Daddy-God gives us a way to see the state of our hearts! I can see how my heart has changed over the year by how my views of Daddy-God have changed.Posted by Jessica at 11:38 PM. Post a comment.
Jan. 18, 17
I love love color, bright vibrant colors, bc bright vibrant colors mean life and abundance! I saw Trolls today, and it reminded me of the vision I had several years ago about how we are all a unique color.Posted by Jessica at 10:30 PM. Post a comment.
Jan. 12, 17
Wisdom can only give life and create beauty..is this why she was the craftsman at His side when He created the world? :')Posted by Jessica at 12:49 PM. Post a comment.
Jan. 7, 17
This thot just came - Daddy-God can only love on what we give over to Him. Loving on someone or something involves cherishing thru direct contact and interaction, so how can He tenderly cherish those parts of ourselves that we don't give over to Him? If we so Love Him, we can give Him everything. What He gave for me leaves me blown away and speechless, so how can I not give Him everything?Posted by Jessica at 11:23 PM. Post a comment.
Jan. 4, 17
Just remembering how our thots affect the atmosphere. Praying is good, but staying in worship and praising Him will shift the atmosphere and will bring the Kingdom in a way that will draw the people around us to Himself.Posted by Jessica at 12:05 PM. Post a comment.
Jan. 1, 17
This will be a year of Jubilee - restoration and abundance.. abundance in relationships and connections!Posted by Jessica at 10:30 PM. Post a comment.
Dec. 30, 16
I love doing what we do! :')Posted by Jessica at 9:54 AM. Post a comment.
Dec. 24, 16
Worship (of something) is an automatic response when we are elated, but not as often when things are hard - and sometimes it's not possible to avoid painful moments, esp. when we have loved and have been loved as we were created to love and be loved. So praising Him in true worship keeps us healthy mentally, emotionally, spiritually and psychologically no matter what's going on.Posted by Jessica at 11:00 PM. Post a comment.
Dec. 16, 16
How could familiar stink and bondage be preferred to freedom? For instance, conversing w/ healthy people is hugely scarier than being in a less healthy environment when healthy interactions aren't a part of daily life, bc the unknown/less familiar is always scary/intimidating..until it becomes known and familiar. :') Father, make Your Ways my known and familiar, my pattern and way of being..Posted by Jessica at 11:59 PM. Post a comment.
Dec. 10, 16
This came to mind as I read these verses in Matthew.. we need to do good and help others when we can (Proverbs 3:27), bc we may be finding ourselves in the presence of angels or Jesus Himself. Are we willing be inconvenienced? It all ends up being for Him whether or not we are aware of it (Him/His Presence) in the moment.Posted by Jessica at 11:17 PM. Post a comment.
Dec. 2, 16
This reminded me how everything just needs to be not only good and polite, but genuine. Nice and polite words and actions mean nothing and can even be harmful if they're not genuine.Posted by Jessica at 3:30 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 30, 16
I was watching The Lord of the Rings trilogy w/ my mom tonight, and we were at the part where Helms Deep is about to be invaded by Saruman's army. Aragorn chose to stay optimistic and pulled on every ounce of hope he could in spite of the overwhelming hopelessness of the situation, which was the only thing King Theoden could see. King Theoden was ready to face being slaughtered, but Aragorn pulled the army thru until Gandolf showed up w/ the aid he had promised..they had victory bc Aragorn stayed optimistic. Optimism will bring us further than being "realistic" ever will, even to a victorious end. On the other hand, being "realistic" usually brings an early end or even defeat/death.Posted by Jessica at 9:54 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 27, 16
No matter what tragedy strikes, Daddy-God can make the present situation better than the former situation.Posted by Jessica at 10:20 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 24, 16
If we listen to what comes out of our mouths, it'll show us what our hearts look like and what's going on in our inmost being. Life, busyness, ignorance, avoidance, etc. can make a person unaware of the state of their heart and inner self, so I love how Daddy-God gives us ways to see how we're doing in the places that truly matter.Posted by Jessica at 7:44 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 20, 16
Praising God changes our options as it changes our perspective bc it opens our hearts and spirits to what He's doing! As I was praising Daddy-God thru the pain this morning during worship, He gave me a word for a friend, which in turn comforted my own heart.Posted by Jessica at 7:31 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 16, 16
I love how praising Him through hard moments always ends with good Solutions!!! :')Posted by Jessica at 11:04 AM. Post a comment.
Nov. 13, 16
I think it's amazing how praising Daddy-God keeps us rightly aligned when we face challenges. Since I'm an extrovert and very musically oriented but don't get to be out w/ people much or a part of the music world, Sunday mornings are my one chance to connect and regroup for the week. This morning, I missed first service worship for a painful reason and several people were gone, so when a small jostle happened it was overly painful. I was able to stay for second service worship, and even tho it was hard to get into it, I knew that if I kept my mind simply praising Him, the pain from the week, that morning and the disconnect would ease out.
As I kept my mind praising Him, I saw again how praising Him keeps our whole being properly aligned as we work thru what we're feeling. When something hard happens, our thots mull over what happened until we either choose to think of something else (possibly not dealing w/ it as a way to not be negative), shut the pain down which only turns it into anger, criticism, negativity, entitlement, numbness, etc., or we work thru it w/ Holy Spirit. As we ride out the wave of pain, tears, or whatever it may be, and praise Him thru it, our hearts stay soft and yielded while the pain and tears run their course. Praising Him causes how we're feeling to dissipate if it needs to, or it keeps us rightly aligned as we work thru it.Posted by Jessica at 10:16 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 9, 16
Someone pulled out a negative in what we were seeing, and it took me a minute to see it bc was nowhere on my horizon. I don't think that way bc I don't like how irritable, negative and critical it makes me feel, and I wondered how a person could pull that negative thing out so quickly. Then I remembered that what we think about is what we see/notice first..that's one way we can check how our thought life is. Could that be one reason Daddy-God wants us think about things that are true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent or praiseworthy?Posted by Jessica at 12:43 PM. Post a comment.
Nov. 4, 16
My heart and spirit jumped w/ excitement as I read this verse, and I read it again. The higher we go and the closer we get to Daddy-God, the more freedom we step into bc as we draw near to Him, we leave behind those things that keep us from being who we were created to be. The freedom to grow and be who we were created to be is exhilarating and ever expanding!Posted by Jessica at 11:04 PM. Post a comment.
Oct. 26, 31 and Nov. 3, 16
The order of events since I returned from the cruise has been intriguing. The last day of the cruise as we were heading home, I was called about participating in a project on advocacy for work, but I didn't hear it until the next week. In the meantime, I found out that a service that was helping me was upset that I was using their services when I'm providing similar services. This meant that I was going to have to opt of receiving their services and explain why. As I was praying about and formulating what to say in the opt-out letter, my weekend driver made my client uncomfortable and stressed (as he does me), so I had to request that he not drive us when she wants to go somewhere. It took a bit of explaining for his boss to understand.
In the midst of working on these two things, I returned the phone call, set up a time to talk about what advocacy means to me, and reviewed the questions I was sent so that I'd be ready to talk about it. During the call this morning, I laughed when I saw how I was having to advocate for myself and someone else as I was working w/ others on this very topic of advocacy. I wrote the opt-out letter a few hours later.Posted by Jessica at 10:40 PM. Post a comment.
Oct. 15-23 Cruise & Reflecting, 16
I love how partnering w/ Daddy-God works! Things in my childhood "encouraged" me not to think, feel or use my intuition if it ever differed from those of the designated leader, This is why it absolutely floors me every time Daddy-God encourages or even pushed me to think, feel and use my intuition, something that's required in partnering w/ Him! Last spring, I sensed that going on the cruise was going to be a 10 mile marathon every day for a week straight bc I'd be staffing a client for 10-12 hrs a day AND everything was going to be new, which meant nothing would in muscle memory. So I began to plan accordingly. I mentally geared up for the week, planned to find high-protein foods, then I also brought a water bottle and energy-boosting snacks. W/ the endless stream of miracles, I was sufficiently prepared for how the week went and even took pictures to enjoy later!Posted by Jessica at 6:57 PM. Post a comment.
Oct. 10 , 16
When we do things for others out of Love and for their benefit, it's less likely going to be that having to do those things repeatedly will become boring or annoying. I play a simple game w/ my client, often for hours at a time bc she enjoys it.. but sometimes I just want to dive into something a little more stimulating. If I stay on that track, I start missing being able to dive into topics, explore ideas and concepts, and just simply learn and grow like I did w/ my dearest boy. That doesn't benefit her and could hurt her if she felt me wishing for something she can't give. Love does things for others' benefit.Posted by Jessica at 11:32 AM. Post a comment.
Oct. 9, 16
Jenn spoke tonight, and it was so good, how to live from Love and bring the Kingdom into our environments in practical ways. One was about not speaking or expressing on social media anything negative - if you can't say something nice, don't speak or post on social media. Another thing she said was a quote from Pastor Bill, "If you watch what you think, you won't need to watch what you say."Posted by Jessica at 9:17 PM. Post a comment.
Oct. 2 & 4, 16
"Run to meet her and ask her, 'Are you all right? Is your husband all right? Is your child all right?'"
Daddy-God doesn't start something just for it to die and disappear. We must know Him to know what He wants to do, then only share and pray w/ those who will be supportive and speak life into what He started.Posted by Jessica at 11:55 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 23 , 16
If we don't understand or like something, we need to ask Daddy-God for His perspective on the situation. Then, if what we see is filled with hope, peace and expectation of good, we can know that we're seeing what He is seeing. Sooo that means that whenever there's hopelessness or fear, that's not Daddy-God cautioning us.. we're seeing what the enemy is trying to make happen, which means we must end the feelings of hopelessness and fear and seek out Daddy-God's Plan.. He speaks to each of us differently/uniquely (I so love that!!) - w/ me, He either gives me a dream or a picture of how He sees the situation and what He's doing.Posted by Jessica at 10:16 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 19, 16
I was reminded this weekend not to ignore those little gentle nudges to say or do something as I thot about an opportunity I had missed. Fixing it ourselves will never bring about the same Kingdom results - we must wait for another God opportunity to come again. I still haven't seen the person I was supposed to say hi to, and I miss her.Posted by Jessica at 10:05 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 15, 16
Sometimes, actually quite often in my life, we have to figure out what we need in order to accomplish something, and then we need to ask Daddy-God for it. His provision then becomes a confirmation that we are being obedient to what He has asked us to do, something we would miss if He gave us what we need magically.Posted by Jessica at 11:55 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 11, 16
Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is Your faithfulness. Lamentations 3:22-23
Eric spoke this morning on how Daddy-God moves differently according to each person and situation, as culture changes, etc., but His message is still the same. This is bc w/ Him is newness of Life! He IS the Creator, so how can we expect Him to work and move in a specific way. He never works or does anything in an ordinaery way w/ me..I think if He did, I'd feel stifled, suffocated and lose my mind. I absolutely love the freedom that we have in Him to be unique and to have Him work uniquely in and thru us!Posted by Jessica at 10:59 PM. Post a comment.
Sept. 4, 16
Watching a young girl braiding her grandmother's hair.. may seem simple, but there's love and honor in that interaction and the girl will carry that memory with her.. Been thinking this week about how every day is a good day to celebrate people, and this is a sweet celebration of this young girl..Posted by Jessica at 8:55 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 28, 16
Paul spoke tonight and said that our effectiveness in the world is only as powerful as our ability to effective, Loving and Honoring when no one knows.. So good.Posted by Jessica at 9:26 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 26, 16
Losing someone we love is always difficult and painful. Having my dearest boy's dad gone is tough, and I'm feeling it more now bc it was around this time that he died.. and also bc I could really use his wisdom and insight on how to navigate some of the things I'm facing at the moment. I woke up this morning remembering something that Pastor Bill visits periodically - never create theology from an experience as a way to make it less painful or easier to accept, theology must only come from what God says in His Word. It is never His Will for accidents, illnesses, cancers, etc. to happen to people, or for people to die from anything except old age, but it happens. God is still good. When things happen that were not a part of His Will, it's humbling to not be able to explain it away, and it's okay to have bad days and to grieve. He is still good, and He is our Comforter. Not allowing ourselves to have bad days or to grieve creates walls as well as cold, distant and hard places in our hearts, which keeps us from being able to Love others w/ His Tenderness, Mercy, Acceptance.... Thank you, Jen, for showing me how to allow the pain and grief to ebb and flow so that my hearts stays soft and Loving. :')Posted by Jessica at 11:20 AM. Post a comment.
Aug. 23, 16
Talking w/ a friend Sun. morning started me thinking about personalities and character traits a little differently. Most of us are familiar w/ who we are, and some think the universe does or should operate the way they do. Here's a "for instance", an underlying goal in my life is true and pure unity and oneness. Even tho I grew up w/ quite the opposite, I can't understand why everyone can't just mush and mesh in a specified direction to form a better (something), broader perspective and be more well-rounded as a whole.. I am, however, very familiar w/ people who enjoy a good debate and even seek out conflict. My natural opinion is to feel that mushing everything is always the way to go, esp. since healthy unity, oneness, relational connection and flow relaxes me so much that my muscles quit twitching almost entirely and my balance, vision and speech improve..probably bc I sleep more soundly. Conflict, division, anger, etc. have the opposite effect on me.
I do know that not everything can or should be mushed together. There are Truths, people and situations that require us to stand/fight for what's right, which will involve, if not require, conflict and debate. I will be assertive and take a stand if a situation requires it even tho the tension is very hard on my muscles. It made me laugh to see that every trait has its purpose and that while we are developing our strengths, we should also be able to sufficiently operate in the areas we don't naturally lean towards. So using the "for instance", a connecting musher person needs to learn to be assertive when neccesary, while a confrontational person needs to learn to mush and mesh to bring unity. :)Posted by Jessica at 8:28 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 18, 16
Life is so much more fun, deep, rich and full when we're pursuing growth and development in who we were created to be. So many people have wanted me to be a certain way that's more like them (or easier for them to deal w/), and it's left me frustrated, negative and irritable. Lately, as I've been looking at how I operate, I've realized that it's been mostly coping mechanisms, not how I really am, which has made me dive into finding out who Daddy-God created me to be so that I can develop it and flower it out. I haven't laughed this much in a long time :') It's also reminded me that the more we like who we are, the more we can celebrate who other people are and how they are different from us!Posted by Jessica at 11:59 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 14, 16
Once again I'm reminded of how Daddy-God provides us w/ what we need, so that we can do what He's called us to do. He's been strengthening me and showing me how to change atmospheres and influence my environments, so I told Him that if He wants me to bring about the change He has put on my heart for more than 20 years now, that He needs to bring me into healthy relationships and also bring me a person I can process w/.. He's been bringing me into healthy relationships, and today I found someone I can process and have accountability w/. :)Posted by Jessica at 10:55 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 10, 16
When we put Daddy-God first and we meet up w/ opposition and various distractions that bring fear or doubt, He will be our Defender as we trust Him w/ each circumstance.Posted by Jessica at 11:23 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 7, 16
We always have things to learn and grow in because none of us knows everything, and realizing this helps us to stay humble and learn to honor and respect those who are skilled at things that we aren't. I choose to be around people who are good at the very things I need to work on, bc I want to learn and grow and strengthen the areas I'm weak in. Even tho it's scary and hard, the end result of growth and things learned makes it all worth facing.Posted by Jessica at 10:56 PM. Post a comment.
Aug. 4, 16
I will go before you
Learning new things and venturing into the unknown is never easy, but it's the only way to move forward w/ Daddy-God.Posted by Jessica at 10:55 PM. Post a comment.
July 31, 16
If we pursue Daddy-God and the life He's calling us to, we'll draw friends who are on a similar journey and who will support and encourage us. If we pursue friendships for the sake of having friends, they will pull us in all kinds of different directions, the directions that each of them are pursuing.Posted by Jessica at 10:32 PM. Post a comment.
July 21, 16
Daddy-God doesn't always tell us what to do.. Sometimes He's watching to see how we respond to situations in order to see what's in our hearts. Never tire of doing what is good (2 Thes. 3:13) ..stop for the one.Posted by Jessica at 10:59 AM. Post a comment.
July 17, 16
Found this intriguing - we need help to do what Daddy-God calls us to do. None of us is called be a lone ranger..when we are called to do something, we need support from those around us. In other words, we get to be a part of each other's callings! I so love that!!Posted by Jessica at 10:06 PM. Post a comment.
July 10, 16
I learned a lesson on the importance of timing the hard way this morning bc I missed an opportunity..timing is as crucial as what we say and do. I saw someone I knew and felt a nudge to say hi to her, but I hesitated for a minute or more. Once a few friends began talking to her, I realized I had missed a Daddy-God moment, and I knew that saying hi then just to be obedient would lack Holy Spirit's Presence and Touch. I never want to do that again. When He nudges go, we need to go so we don't miss out on what He's doing or miss an opportunity to Love and encourage someone.Posted by Jessica at 11:57 AM. Post a comment.
July 6, 16
This thot made me laugh this morning: when you can't find the gold on the surface, you'd better go digging until you find some. It reminded me of the story of the twin boys; one was a pessimist and the other an optimist, and for their sixth birthday the pessimist's room was filled w/ every present he wanted while the optimist found a pile of manure in his room. The pessimist complained about having too many presents, that he'd have to share and that no one would want to play w/ him anymore, while the optimist was in his room, jumping up and down on the manure pile and saying, "There's got to be a pony in here somewhere!" It made me think about pursuing friendships with people who are going in the direction you want to go, who are going after Daddy-God and learning to Love like He Loves.. more than likely those same people will also value the digging that you do to find the gold.Posted by Jessica at 10:30 PM. Post a comment.
July 3, 16
One of the things Kris talked about this morning was how we chose the people we allow to influence us.. I loved it. He talked about how we need to pursue relationships w/ those who are going in the direction we want to go, not those who make us feel better about being in the mud holes that we should be getting out of. He used the example of fear, saying that if we're afraid, we should choose to be around someone who won't empathize w/understand our fears instead of friends who will. We're not suppose to fear, doubt, etc. so we need to make it a point to spend quality time with those who won't be empathetic/understanding when we're stuck in these things. It made me smile bc I've been making myself face and build relationships w/ friends who are healthy and are pursuing a direction that I want to go since I started my healing process. My dearest boy's dad was the first person I chose to face and build a relationship w/ bc I knew he was healthy and safe, even tho it was terrifying until I learned to trust him. Now I'm pursuing relationships w/ those who are pursuing Daddy-God w/ a passion, who look like Him and who Love like He Loves. I am not as far along as they are, and the only way to get there is to change how I think and be in relationships w/ them and others like them.
June 30, 16
One boy gave Jesus five loaves and two fish, and another boy gave Him seven loaves and a few fish, from which Jesus fed the thhousands. Quite often in my life Daddy-God doesn't step in until I start something or give Him something to start w/. This may be bc I don't like taking the initiative, I've become discouraged and lost my motivation, or some such thing.. but it intrigues me that He's so insistent that I take enough to action give Him something to work w/ bc He wants it to be a partnership. A few weeks ago, I applied to have someone help me w/ things at home in the hopes of having someone who might take me hiking or something outdoorsy, and a few days after I sent off the application, I met a woman at church who likes to go to the lake, camping, etc..a friend instead of someone who is paid.Posted by Jessica at 11:59 PM. Post a comment.
June 26, 16
Pastor Bill spoke on this this morning, and I loved how he explained things. Daddy-God is truly the Comforter and Healer, coming to the broken and wounded to comfort and to heal them, but it's to those who lift up their heads and praise Him w/ hope and expectation that He comes as the King of Glory. I love that! .. Bc of my history w/ Him and how He taught me to praise Him in the midst of excruciating pain, I am closer to the point where looking up in praise is an automatic response to pain. I know that praising Him thru the pain of losing my treasures and missing them is the only reason I didn't crack, and it makes me stand in such awe of Him now, even tho it felt unbelievably cruel at the time.Posted by Jessica at 10:03 PM. Post a comment.
June 23, 16
As I was getting into bed, this thot popped into my head.. the more we give/release over to Him, the more He has to work with and can bless.Posted by Jessica at 11:57 PM. Post a comment.
June 19, 16
I saw Me Before You this afternoon, and it was quite sad, w/ an ending devoid of hope. I could relate to the character that most people will probably connect me w/, but not for the reason they may think.. It made me ask Daddy-God why He has never let me go down that hole even when I've really wanted to.. and no matter how low and deep I've gone into zone mode when people pain hits hard and wipes me out? Whenever I go into a zone bc of all the pain, He'll give me someone to love thru a tender interaction and connection, someone I'm learning to trust (who won't add to the pain), and it will revive me enough to be able to take hold of Him to be revived the rest of the way. Today, I saw a friend twice and Pastor Bill, plus the new friend I saw the movie w/. As I thot about how He always revives my heart and my spirit, He reminded me that I tell Him every night as I'm getting into bed that I am His and that I want Him to whatever He has to do to get rid of everything in me that keeps Him from using me so that He can do whatever He desires to do w/ my life, to change me so that nothing hinders Him. So I guess that's what He's doing, giving me what I need to keep going, to keep growing and to keep changing into His likeness.. and it made me laugh when He said that He's just respecting my wishes, lol. He will come, but that doesn't mean it's easy.Posted by Jessica at 10:40 PM. Post a comment.
June 16, 16
This has been rolling around in my head for quite some time, and I thot I had already written about it. Who doesn't want to support what Daddy-God is doing in a person's life? My assumption is that most of us want to rally around and support what He's doing or wanting to do, but how do we know if something is a God-thing or not? Just bc He tells someone something, doesn't mean He'll fill us in.. in Prince Caspian, only Lucy saw Aslan, so the others had to trust her to take them where they needed to go. We need to take note of what Daddy-God is doing in people's lives in order to know how to encourage and support them.. Perhaps this is what Pastor Bill did when I asked him for prayer and covering for the restoration of my marriage..the guard who was w/ him had just had his marriage restored, giving him an idea of what Daddy-God was wanting to do w/ my marriage.Posted by Jessica at 11:58 PM. Post a comment.
June 12, 16
Eric talked this morning about how Daddy-God has no cap for the abundance He wants to give us, but w/ abundance comes responsibility.. something I've been experiencing. As I mentioned in my last post, He's been bringing quality people into my life again, but in order honor and value each one, I have to be strategic and organized so that I don't miss opportunities to Love each one. I can no longer connect w/ one or two people then go on my merry way, and I definitely don't want to move from one person to the next bc one seems to meet my needs better than the other..that's happened to me, so I know how painful it is to have people move on. And besides, life is not about us getting our needs met. ;') That means that I need to know what Holy Spirit's doing and be in His flow.. be responsible to be where He wants me to be and pour into those He has for me to pour into.Posted by Jessica at 11:54 PM. Post a comment.
June 7, 16
A dear friend told me once that Daddy-God uses the hard things we go through to strengthen us and prepare us for the hugeness of the blessings and abundance that He has for us..and I think this could be said for the processes we go thru as well. I've been out of the social arena for quite a long time for various reasons, and it's been intriguing to watch Him begin to bring quality people into my life again. It's been one person at a time over the last 10 months, altho most of them have come in recent months. Each one touches a unique area of my life, and I'm needing the lengthen of time I'm being given between each new person to grow so that I can embrace what each one is bringing into my life. :)Posted by Jessica at 9:41 PM. Post a comment.
June 2, 16
It so important, vital, for us to know who we are as Daddy-God's favorite daughters and sons and to be bold and confident in who we are in Him and in His Love for us in order to Love and Honor those around us. But why does it matter if we are confident or have insecurities?
When we have insecurities, we scramble to stay near or at the top and in control, which inevitably means others are stepped on and pushed down whenever an insecurity is tweaked. Our insecurities also cause us to hold back things we have to give others bc we feel inadequate, out of place, too insignificant to matter, or bc we don't want to be in the way or cause problems... On the other hand, when we know who we are as His favorites, we have the confidence and boldness to pour into others all that He pours into us bc we don't need others' acceptance or approval to feed us and build us up. Daddy-God was very strong w/ me to pour into my dearest boy w/out needing acceptance, approval or anything else from him, or others. As I learned to be confident in being Daddy-God's favorite gir, I realized that He had put in me what my dearest boy needed and that I was to pour into him even tho those who didn't know the circumstances wanted me to leave him alone. So I did, and he said that I had the purest love of anyone he knew, then towards the end he told me that I was the only one who loved him w/out an angle. Learning to Love and pouring into him is something I'll never regret.Posted by Jessica at 11:39 PM. Post a comment.
May 30, 16
Losing my dearest boy, his dad and the rest of his family has been pretty devastating, not just bc losing someone we're close to is always hard, but bc they saw parts of me that no one ever had or really has since. One big part of me that they saw was music.. I have music in my head non-stop, which intrigued his dad, so he had me sing for him and said I have perfect pitch (a genetic ear thing). I also have good rhythm in my head, which is often my prayer language. Having each of them notice my musical aptitude made me feel so alive and free. I watched my dearest boy with piqued interest bc he was so extremely talented musically that he could pick up any instrument and teach himself how to play it. As I got to know him, I knew that enything he learned, he'd show me bc he liked having me enjoy what he was into.. it's how he was with me ever since the day we met. How we met went like this...
Hi! I'm Jerry. What's your name?
No one had ever liked to share things, places and people like I do! and it blew me away.. He was talented like Prince only full of Holy Spirit, so since he liked sharing who he was and what he was into with me, there would have been no limit to what I could have learned and how I could have grown musically even tho I can't sing or play instruments myself. Both he and his dad found it worthwhile to help me learn and grow musically.. I even scratched the surface of orchestration in one of the music theory classes I took. Now that they are gone, there's not only the pain of losing them, but the music world is also pretty much beyond reach, as are many other things. So I've decided to focus on growing my chartacter, loving/honoring others and learning anything I can get my hands on order to keep from moping myself into a hole.
Their relationships with me made me feel real and alive bc they saw who I was. My first encounter with his dad opened up a whole new world to me and prepared me for getting to know my dear boy. I remember sitting in the front row in chapel our first day back from Christmas break. I was people-watching and talking with friends when I looked up to see his dad looking at me. He was sitting at the piano, and he winked and smiled at me when he caught my eye. It startled me and I jumped bc as he smiled at me, I felt seen.. it felt like he saw into me to who I was more completely than anyone ever had, like he could see how I was feeling and thinking. (He actually did read my face and body language very accurately bc he had a high Emotional Intelligence or EQ.) The jolt from feeling seen so distinctly made me quickly look down in order to hide and regain composure. My friends wanted me to go with them to choir practice that night where he was the director, so I brought a book bc I was fully aware that I can't sing. Nevertheless, the music compelled me to look up, and when he caught my eye, he directed me with winks and smiles.
As I made myself learn to talk and interact with him, I grew in who I was created to be and healed from things in my childhood. People have always said that I communicate well, but once I was seen, known and read so accurately by him, it felt as tho I had been living in a box that had only functioned in the daily routines and that I had been watching the world thru a peephole that no one knew existed.. - People took me with them here and there (still do), but no one read/reads me to see how things have affected me or that what I've needed is real bc they haven't needed the same things. - Then I met his dear boy, who saw even more into me than his dad did. I suppose that's why I wasn't surprised when he said he wanted to get into my head and be inside my thots.. I said he could come in, so he did.
He climbed inside my head, saw things thru my eyes and wanted to help me do physical things so that I had more brain-space for being aware of/interacting with the world around me, and also for exploring thots/ideas with him, learning and growing along my own areas of interest, as well as growing into who Daddy-God made me to be. He was also the only person to regularly want to know what I was thinking, which led to exhilerating conversations! Those connections and flow in conversation completely relaxed my muscles and stopped the spastic twitches, which improved my sleep and gave me enough muscle control to be able to draw the way I wanted to. The trippy part of having him "in my head" was that he could do the right hand parts without me having to ask or explain anything, and when he did, his hand worked so perfectly w/ mine that I actually had a taste of what it's like to have two hands that work together like they were made to. As we spent time with people, both he and his dad saw what I wanted to contribute to conversations and engaged with me in a way that kept me in the loop and helped people to see that what I was thinking made sense and was usable and necessary. The way that they both interacted with me seemed to encourage those around them to want to engage with me as well.
With them gone, I battle so much frustration, pain and loss from not being seen/read accurately or having help to contribute what I have that's needed, so I think a lot in order to make the best of where I've landed. This morning, during first service it clicked.. I can turn my frustration, pain and loss into a focused passion to grow my EQ, my ability to see/read people accurately, esp. clients at Compass, in a way that brings them out like my dearest boy and his dad did with me. What insights, supports and routines could we offer our clients to help them feel more alive, connected and able to engage more with the world/people around them?Posted by Jessica at 11:48 PM. Post a comment.
May 23, 16
I am a friend to all who fear You,
Reading Psalm 119 made this really click this morning - following Kingdom laws and living by Kingdom standards creates peace and order and helps us to live in a healthy lifestyle that enables us to heal and empowers us to fulfill our destinies. Living according to these laws and standards also teaches us how to maintain healthy and honoring relationships..it's so beautiful!Posted by Jessica at 11:57 AM. Post a comment.
May 15, 16
As I was talking to a friend this morning (and being thoroughly encouraged), I saw so clearly how we each have a role and play a vital part in bringing the Kingdom to earth. His words encourage me and give me what I need so that I can go encourage, support and pour into those I'm suppose to encourage, support and pour into..so that they can bring the Kingdom into their situations and pour into those around them! We all have an important role to play, and if we don't do our part(whether it seems significant or not), there will be a hole that quite possibly no one else will be able to fill.Posted by Jessica at 4:49 PM. Post a comment.
May 9, 16
I've been reading in Deuteronomy about all the rules, regulations and laws the Israelites had and the wars they fought and how they annihilated their enemies. I know that all of that was a way of life back then as people groups conquered other people groups. But as I was reading tonight about the clean and unclean laws regarding what they could and couldn't eat or even touch, I realized how Daddy-God is after the concept of a matter, not the formality of it. He wants us to annihilate every area in our lives that is under the enemy's influence like the Israelites were supposed to annihilate their enemies, and He also wants us to stay clean from sin and as strictly as they steered clear of all unclean foods and things that spread disease. Since He is after our hearts and not a religious formality, we are not to force our convictions on others..He gives each of us convictions and guidelines that are specific to His plans for our lives.Posted by Jessica at 11:35 PM. Post a comment.
May 6, 16
Why the resistance? And why so much of it? For some reason, it clicked this morning. Daddy-God allows resistance bc resistance strengthens us until we become unbreakable as steel.Posted by Jessica at 10:46 AM. Post a comment.
May 1, 16
The scope of the Truth of Daddy-God being our Provider reaches worlds farther than we'll ever realize. Meeting our physical needs is only a tiny part of it. I've shared how He's provided what I needed to stay faithful to my dearest boy, and I'm reminded of how faithful He is in providing what we need as He's been launching me into positions He's created me for. Last week, as I began to see specific direction on things He's calling me to be a part of and support, I understood why the enemy had been bombarding me so intensely that I could feel it affecting my brain. So I said, "If You want me to do this, I need my own support and covering. Otherwise, he's going to pull me under." I asked again before second service began.. within a half hour, He connected me with a friend, and we decided to speak Truth to each other during the week as a way to encourage each other and come against the enemy's lies. Kris closed worship time by having people stand who felt worn down, discouraged, etc., and as soon as we had finished being prayed for my mom texted me that she was on her way.. He provided, so I must go.Posted by Jessica at 11:17 PM. Post a comment.
April 28, 16
Rescue those being led away to death;
Doing good every time there is an opportunity takes sensitivity and assertiveness. We may not know what people are going thru or what they need, but their Daddy-God does, so how are we going to respond? Bringing the Kingdom to earth rarely happens by chance or bc it it's convenient, easy and served to us on a platter. Doing good takes time to stop for the one in front of us.Posted by Jessica at 2:41 PM. Post a comment.
April 25, 16
Fear keeps us from where we're supposed to be going and out of our inheritance.Posted by Jessica at 11:48 PM. Post a comment.
April 21, 16
Heard this earlier in the day and rather clearly as I was getting ready for bed tonight.. Loving someone involves learning who they are and honoring why they are on this ball of land and water.Posted by Jessica at 12:52 AM. Post a comment.
April 17, 16
There are some atmospheric things that need to change, and I've been trying to walk in the authority I have to shift these things but have been feeling overwhelmed by the enormity of it and how negatively it's affecting me. This morning Daddy-God brought this story to mind as I was praying for help and reminded me that if I do my part and give what I have towards shifting the atmosphere, that He will do the rest of the work as well as amplify the positive affect that changing the atmosphere will have on me. If we don't step out and give Him something to work w/, He can still work, but it's not much of a partnership :')Posted by Jessica at 11:24 PM. Post a comment.
April 11, 16
Had a funny conversation w/ Daddy-God yesterday morning hours before even the sun knew it was time to be up. For background, I'm not suppose to think about my physical issues beyond finding a healthy fix that will put them back on sidelines, bc the physical stuff is not who I am :') Last Sunday, I had made a chocolate snacky thing to see if it would help my muscles not burn so much w/ the heat like the drink had last summer, and the trial run proved successful - muscles quit burning for hrs at a time, I didn't feel nauseous, I had energy and an appetite, and I felt happy w/out having to try, lol. I lay there sensing humor in the air even tho I was tired.
- How am I going to make it thru this summer?
Clearly He's not distraught over how the summer affects me..the fix is easy, bc He wants my focus to be on the other things He has for me to do, like Loving others out of overflow of His Love and affection for me. ...
- But why chocolate? Bc You're the King of funny?Posted by Jessica at 4:27 PM. Post a comment.
April 8, 16
Was reading Leviticus tonight..were all those different sacrifices for different sins and offenses to show us that nothing we say or do is mundane or meaningless? Every word and action carries weight, whether it is for good, or not so good.Posted by Jessica at 12:27 AM. Post a comment.
April 5, 16
When we like who we are and are comfortable in our own skins, we won't need others to be just like us in order to feel at ease ..we'll be able to honor and embrace the differences in others in the midst of enjoying the commonalities.Posted by Jessica at 10:43 AM. Post a comment.
April 1, 16
This verse reminded me of when I had asked Daddy-God to break off all my non-Kingdom mind-sets and generational patterns so that I could be free to live the life He had planned for me and so that my children could start out clean and free. One Sunday afternoon, I drove around to places where fear had felt overpowering and I declared the opposite, then later that night my dear friend from Washington showed up outside my window! She had just gone thru the training of breaking these things off, so she went thru the process w/ me. It intrigued me that we didn't just break things off, she had me bind the strong man for each area, cast him at Jesus' feet and declared the opposite over me and my future generations. In order for Daddy-God's Kingdom to come, strongholds must be taken down so that people have the freedom to make good choices. Love how He does things bc it's all about freedom!Posted by Jessica at 12:48 PM. Post a comment.
March 26, 16
Control limits or removes people's options while taking authority over the atmosphere shuts down the enemy so that people have more options and the freedom to make wise decisions.Posted by Jessica at 1:01 PM. Post a comment.
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